From the Caribbean to the Gulf

December 21st - Amanda and I temporarily part ways for the holidays. She heads back to New York to visit her family like a good daughter, and I fly to the Yucatan to road trip from the Caribbean to the Gulf coast with Robert, my friend from home. (I thought it was an OK and relatively sensible plan until I got to Nicaragua where everyone almost feinted when they found out I was going to be away from my parents during the holidays. "Do you have a mother?" They asked. "Do you like your family?" And then, "Do you believe in God?" Not sure how the last one is a logical tangent but none-the-less I have been asked this more frequently than one would think.)

January 4th - Amanda, her friend Josh from Boston, and I meet in Quito, Ecuador to continue our shenanigans southward.

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After traveling for two months with Miss Amanda, the one person who now fully understands my every need at any given second, I was nervous to switch gears a bit to take up traveling with a male. Amanda and I have each other down. She knows when I need space and when when it's best to let me sit and dwell in my own thoughts. Or when all I need is an ice cream cone to turn my mood a 180. We can list each other's favorite foods without two seconds of thought. And when my emotions are a rollercoaster from one moment to the next - one second I'm feeling guilty about American consumerism, the next I'm freaking out about the future, and then, two minutes later I'm crying only because I'm counting the miles left on a public bus until I can pee -how is any male going to be able to put up with me?

But while I was anxious at first, driving across Mexico is exactly what you would expect any road trip to be: hilarious moments of extreme confusion. And a flat tire. And of course the typical guy vs gal, driving vs navigation controversy.

Somewhere between Chichen Itza (one of the 7 Modern Wonders of the World!) and the Gulf of Mexico - aka a 1.5 lane highway decorated with pot holes the size of Delaware, I decided I wanted a turn at driving. I figured it was as deserted a road as we would find, and I couldn't get away with sitting in a car for 2 weeks and not driving at all.

And besides, when driving in Mexico, it's alright if you don't already know how. Because it's like going to Driver's Ed all over again. While in the car. The highways have white instructional signs every couple of feet, crap I mean meters. You should not go above the speed limit. Pass only when it is opportune. If you wear your seatbelt your life will be saved. OK, we got that down. Then the words of wisdom you get on Day 2 of your education: No maneje cansado, Don't drive tired. Cuando llueve maneje despacio, When it rains drive slow. Then around Day 3 you start getting the scare-tactic videos: Nada es lo mismo despues un accidente, Nothing is the same after an accident. Dangit, if only that sign had been in Albuquerque perhaps I would still have my Honda.

As we pull a Chinese Fire-drill in the middle of the road only shared by sunflowers, palm trees, and stray dogs, I comment: "This is the first time I have driven in almost 3 months. And I don't remember the last time I drove a stick." Robert, being the calm bloke he is, said it's like riding a bike and proceeded to play with the CD player.

Let me just say this: Driving a baby puke yellow Fiat Panda 4x4 that mildly resembles a turtle across the Yucatan is an experience no one should miss.

Aeriel: Hey, where are we?

Robert: I dunno.

A: You have the map.

R: We're somewhere. Go straight.

A: There's gas ahead so we must be close to Telchac Puerto, right?

R: OK.

A: What hotel are we looking for?

R: It's in the book.

A: You have the book.

R: I have to read?! . . . It says go west. Which way's west?

A: We've been going west all day.

R: Yea that's what I said. Go straight . . . What are you doing??

(At this point in the conversation we are entering a town. And I get stuck on a speed bump in 1st gear. And then get in a confused dance with a dump truck at the following intersection.)

Needless to say we switched seats pretty soon after.

But I have to say I can navigate pretty well when equipped with the proper tools - map and chocolate in hand. Even though we did pass through the same intersection 4 times in 1 hour yesterday.